I AM 4 MAD (Making a Difference)

Big difference or small difference? Big. When I was young and in college at the University of the Philippines, I wanted to change no less than the World. They called it System, but it didn't make any difference! What happened? I changed. After much heartache, years and years of that. Did the World change me? No, I couldn't change the World, so I changed myself. Big difference.

I'm trying to make a difference, trying to sow hope where there is despair, sow love where there is hate. That, of course, is impossible to do, except if you become a saint. In the meantime, I also am trying not to throw garbage except into the garbage can.

The Ten Commandments Of Criticism

Or, How to make men worthy who are only angry minds

1. Go for gold. Filipinos are today’s Asia’s sports champions; from that, a golden lesson. Help bring out the best, not the beast. Know that even King Kong has a heart. We need the best minds, not the worst means. What the country needs right now is credit, not discredit. If you can’t be part of the solution, stop being part of the problem! If you can’t be a good coach to others, coach yourself to keep your mouth shut more often than you like it.

2. Work for, not against. The battle is not King Kong against Narnia in the world’s box office but evil against good. If you must criticize, dig deep down and see if you understand what’s going on before you say anything. If you are tempted to say something not very nice, try it first on the mirror.

3. Stop! Stop belaboring the point and start laboring with the oppressed or, at least, stop oppressing them further. Stop digging the hole deeper like a dog, or wider – it might become a mass grave that will engulf everyone, including you. Remember this: ‘Stop crying over spilt milk – you only make it salty for the cat.’ Make a record, not play a broken one.

4. Help! Jump off your lofty altar and help someone, or something. Even God humbled Himself and became man to save man from himself; the Word became not merely words but an act of redemption. If you want to redeem others, redeem yourself at the same time. Help change yourself a little everyday, even just a little.

5. Construct, not destruct. You can kill either by sword or by word – and neither requires bravery, only knavery. It’s easier to be a fool than a tool. If you can’t find something to build, if you can’t help build up, at least help rebuild. Learn from the Chinese: ‘Many hands make light work.’

6. Do it yourself. Lush after virtue, not lash at people without – every other critic is doing that already. Jesus said, ‘He who is without sin, cast the first stone.’ If you can’t be original, at least be different. Do something you’ve never done before: If you can’t see something good, do one.

7. Make good meat, not mince. It’s easy to chew out someone else; all you have to do is open your mouth. If you insist, bite, but don’t bite off more than you can chew – it’s not good for digestion. ‘From the same source comes both blessing and curse.’ Bless yourself and do not be a curse.

8. Look for good examples, not bad. A good example: Stop battering people and start making good batter, or even better butter. The good life has to be lived, not paid lip service to. If all you can see are bad examples, you must be one yourself.

9. Spread, not shred. Collect the good news and spread it. Collect the bad news and shred it, not spread it – the mass media are doing that already. If you can’t find good news? Don’t make it up: Make it. Stop finding fault and start finding ways to help.

10. Look inside you, not outside. You see people who have the wealth of the world but are afflicted with a poverty of the spirit. If you see nothing but things to scorn, you are afflicted with the same disease, which is worse than AIDS, the disease of the flesh, because yours is the disease of the soul. ‘He has the right to criticize who has the heart to help,’ Abraham Lincoln said. Have a heart!

Fellows, I AM MAD, or trying to be!

No, I'm not leaving RP-Rizal Yahoogroup; it's just that I have set my
Group Options from 'Daily Email' to 'Daily Digest.' That's because,
after the last several encounters, I mean posts, from me to you and
from you to me, I have decided to move on from
Discussing,
Debating,
Arguing,
Enumerating,
Illustrating,
Citing,
Quoting,
Elucidating,
Averring,
Correcting,
Rebutting,
to making a visible if subtle difference in the lives (at least in the
thinking) of ordinary people and extraordinary people, students,
parents, professionals, Internet users, authors, editors, newsletter
makers, magazine producers, book publishers -- everyone who can read.

Join me. I have just created this group, I AM MAD, OR TRYING TO BE,
where MAD is making a difference. Because now I want to devote my time
to giving even when there is no more to give: a little hope, a little
advice, a little tip, a little lesson, a little idea, a little story, a
little material thing, even a little money if you happen to be around
and need it. All the big world is asking is a little: a little peace, a
little love.

Be a member of the group. Heroes are welcome, big and small. Rizal,
Bonifacio, Aguinaldo, Antonio Luna, Marcelo Hilario del Pilar, William
Henry Scott, Jose Cecilio whoever. Not necessarily in that order.

Contrary minds are welcome too, big and small. Now, what are the rules
to follow about debating? None! There is going to be no debating if I
can help it. But if you insist on debating, I shall expect each message
to summarize the points that the previous message has made right at the
beginning of the message in reply. This has a dual purpose: One: If you
force yourself to make a summary of 'the other side,' you will either
see that he is really right or he is really wrong. Good for you, good
for me (you don't waste my time). Two: If I see that you make a poor or
bad summary of the other side, deliberately or not, you will hear from
me. Good for you, good for me (I'm tired of all those name-calling,
twisting the facts, evading the issue, obfuscation that are obviously
deliberate).

The thing is to think of how to make even just a little difference in
your society, even if that difference happens to be outside the
Philippines.

This was actually my first blog here, posted 31 December; I don't know how I lost it and I don't know how to change the date of the saving.

The Ten Commandments Of Making A Difference

1. Making a difference is the goal. No matter how little, if it’s within your power to make, just make it! If you deserve a reward and not expect it, then it must be the right thing to do. Like donating to charity or picking up litter.

2. Sharing is the way to do it. If it hurts, then that’s the right thing to share.

3. There is no Sabbath in making a difference. There is no non-Sabbath either.

4. Whatever you do, do it in the name of the family. The family is the smallest unit of society – if you help to disintegrate it, you are disintegrating your own humanity.

5. Do not kill the enthusiasm of people by mocking the little that they can share. Little things mean a lot to people who have nothing!

6. Do not steal; do not rob the rich to give to the poor. When you share, be true to yourself, be true to others.

7. When you share, be pure in your intentions. Do not expect anything in return more than a thank you or a simple, shy smile.

8. If it’s negative, do not deny it. Rather, look for the positive, and that’s what you share.

9. Share what you have, but not your spouse or your partner. Make love, not make people unhappy.

10. Share what you have with those who have and those who have none. ‘For none is so rich that he cannot receive, and none is so poor that he cannot give.’ You can share a story, tip, lesson, idea, suggestion, quote, joke, reading, movie, book, recipe, hope, touch. The more you do it, you and nobody else will be none the richer.

Frank A Hilario, 1 January 2006